Unicorn Valley is a safe and easy-to-use platform for founding potential unicorns. Anyone can launch their startup within seconds, regardless of the quality of their idea.
|S Valley||Unicorn Valley|
comes with pay cut
work from anywhere
H1B visa required
no visa required
|Cost of Housing||❌|
We use only bleeding-edge versions of the coolest JS frameworks. We migrate our codebase every few weeks to the hottest new stack on Hacker News.
No QA, no polish, no blockers. Nothing stands between our code and you. Our code is so fresh, if you want it any fresher, you'll have to write it yourself.
Like any proper startup we don't have a monetisation strategy and we spend too much time coding to think of one, so in the meantime you get to use Unicorn Valley for free.
Unlike Jimmy Wales, we store our valuable data on an award-winning blockchain platform. Watch out for our upcoming cryptocurrrency — aptly named BitCorn 🌽.
Not too long ago, our founders were slowly coming to terms with the growing realisation that they would shortly exhaust their runway, and be forced across the thin line separating founders from unemployment. Contemplating the loss of their C-suite titles, it was then that they realised the source of their failure and a potential opportunity.
Clearly, their lack of success was entirely attributable to the absence of a garage. This glaring omission quickly remedied, they turned their attention to the opportunity: the vast majority of people in the world are in fact non-founders. The brains of the billions and billions of these non-founders, all of whom obviously harbouring a secret desire to found unicorns, remained unpicked. And so Unicorn Valley was born.
To connect the world with the Valley,
and organise the trillions of billion-dollar ideas within.
This site uses HTTPS so everything on it must be true.
We believe Bitcorn's innovative proof of sloth consensus algorithm has the potential to massively reduce our carbon footprint… possibly even reverse climate change and rejuvenate our ice caps.
Who controls the memes, controls the Universe
…Unicorn Valley. It's really good.